Passport Letter

[Grapenut]

Amen,brudda. Nut

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THIS IS PRICELESS: ACTUAL PASSPORT APPLICATION LETTER SENT BACK TO STATE DEPARTMENT...

Dear Mrs. Ms. Or Sir: I'm in the process of renewing my passport and still cannot believe this. How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a cable TV from them in 1987 (23 years ago), and yet, the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date. For Christ's sake, do you guys do this by hand? Ever heard of computers?​

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My birth date you have in my social security file. It's on EVERY income tax form I've filed for the past 35+ years. It's on my Medicare health insurance card and my driver's license, it's on the last eight damned passports I've had, it's on every stupid customs declaration form I've had to fill out before being allowed off the plane for the last 30+ years. And it's on all those census forms that we have to do at election times. Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Maryanne, my father's name is Robert and I'm reasonably confident that neither name is likely to change between now and when I die.​

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Between you and me, I've had enough of this bureaucratic BS! You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my #*&#%*& address. What is going on? You must have a gang of bureaucratic Neanderthal morons working there! Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? And "No," I don't want to dig up Yasser Arafat, for shit sakes. I just want to go and park my a-- on a sandy beach. And would someone please tell me, why would you give a damn whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not want to tell anyone!​

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Well, I have to go now because I have to go to the other end of the city and get another #*@&#^@*@ copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $100. Would it be so difficult to have all the services in the same area so I could get a new passport the same day? Nooooo, that would require planning and organization. And it would be too logical for the @&^*^%@% government. You'd rather have us running all over the place like chickens with our heads cut off. Then, we have to find some a--h--- to confirm that it's really me in the damn picture - you know, the one where we're not allowed to smile.​

Hey, you know why we can't smile? We're totally pissed off!​

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Signed- An Irate Citizen.​

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P.S. Remember what I wrote about getting someone to confirm that the picture is me? Well, my family has been in the United States of America since 1776. I have served in the military for something over 35 years and have had security clearances up the ying yang. However, I have to get someone important to verify who I am - you know, someone like my doctor....WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN INDIA ! And you assholes want to run our health care system?????
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[reddog]

Funny but, last 8 passports??? How old is this guy, from what I remember they are good for 10 years..

 

[Kingsnake]

US Official Passport

As a 35+ year Military vet or current Govt employee above a certain clearance level he may be traveling under the brown colored Official US Passport which is valid for 5 years from the date of issue..

 

[mosin]

Last time we went out of the country my wife had to get a travel document as her old one was expired. They cashed the check in a matter of days, but it took 3+ months to get the travel document. Few more weeks and we would've had to cancel the damn vacation.

 

[majormadmax]

Passport application? Piece of cake! I am filling a renewal out as we speak (I too have more than one).

I just went thru a five-year periodic reinvestigation for my security clearance, if this guy thinks a passport application is bad he ought to see what crazy information I have to provide despite having held a clearance for over 30 years!

 

[benenglish]

... he may be traveling under the brown colored Official US Passport ...

I never could get a red passport. I tried and came close once for a trip to Hungary...but it didn't pan out.

 

[CanTex]

Dang I had to fill out paperwork for my first security clearance when I was 19. And had to account for 20 years prior to the date of application. It did come back as incomplete until I stated I was not born during this period of time.

 

[recoveringyankee]

Dang I had to fill out paperwork for my first security clearance when I was 19. And had to account for 20 years prior to the date of application. It did come back as incomplete until I stated I was not born during this period of time.

LOL, if it were me and I was the same type I am now that I am older I would have put something like "Mom's uterus" as the home address for the first 9 months then would have gotten creative if the form wanted me to go back further.

Perhaps those kinds of responses contributed to my two clearance applications I did fill out going nowhere.......

 

[Renegade]

I never could get a red passport. I tried and came close once for a trip to Hungary...but it didn't pan out.

I have had all four major colors red, black, blue, green. The .gov ones were for 5 years as Kingsnake said.

 

[majormadmax]

CanTex, it hasn't gotten any better...