practical jokes at work

[cowboy45]

Anyone want to chime in on this?
My favorite is to put a small piece of clear tape over the mouthpiece on the phone. Drives them nuts. they can hear but cannot speak.
I have a pocket full of them that dont hurt, but are good for a laugh.

 

[Eli]

Worst one we used to do when I worked auto parts was white lithium grease on the toilet seat...

Eli

 

[texas1willy2]

A buddy of mine works at a decent size company with assigned parking, one morning he got to work early and moved all their parking signs over one space. He said at 7:30 they had the biggest traffic jamb in the parking lot.

 

[MuddyWaterMan]

We have to wake the crew up every 6 hours for watch change on the boat. When we used to get a heavy sleeper we would put a hand full of ball bearings in the freezer for a few hours, then throw them in bed with the guy... you can NOT roll away from those damn things!!! Oh, and fill the fingers of the work gloves with a little bit of grease.

 

[GM.Chief]

OHHHHH.....lots. Lets see, I work on a boat as well and we have plenty. Most work best with new mariners.

Start with throwing ball bearings into the overhead in someone's room (you can't sleep 'cuz they get to rollin' like crazy in a swell).

Finding the FNG and convincing him we need to "tune" the radars. To do this, we wrap their arms, heads, legs in aluminum foil and them have them stand outside (where everyone else, including other crews, can watch take pics, etc.) holding up their arms and strike various poses.

Sending them to find some "Relative bearing" grease.

Sending them to find a left handed smoke shovel.

Sending them to find a bucket of "prop-wash" to clean the wheelhouse windows.

Cut up strips of paper and place them in a ziploc bag. Then have the new guy run around outside to get a "fog sample" to see if its too foggy to paint. (umm..sorry these results aren't clear enough, can you try again?)

I have not tried the white lithium grease on the toilet (but I may now), however saran wrap on the toilet works great (note: you have to get it tight, too loose and it's highly visible)

Convinced one of the captains to climb on top of one engine while we were working on another. When he was really concentrating on the task at hand, started the one he was on...he nearly...well, never mind.

Some of the guys have the cloth inserts in their hard hats. We put a fish inside it. Phew...the best part was that he could not figure out why his hat stunk so bad.

Icy hot on the band of the hard hat.

I'm sure I'll think of more later. And no, I did not do all of these myself...although I helped alot...lol

 

[DoubleActionCHL]

I like to do computer jokes like flipping the display upside down, cranking up the speakers so "I'm looking at gay porn!!!!" blares when they log in, reversing the mouse buttons, or assigning frequently hit keys as hot keys for applications or functions. When you have users on opposing desks, we just swap mouse and keyboard but leave them connected to the original computer. Yeah, geeky. I know.

Years ago I worked in banking. I'd leave pranks for the night guy, and he'd screw with me the next morning. We had this huge check sorter. If you taped a card at just the right place in the check path, the checks would fly out into the middle of the room at a rate of about 1200 per minute.

The best one ever, though, was the fart-in-a-box. I can't do it justice, but I received this little swag gift in a fancy leatherette box. I decided to mess with my co-worker, so I cranked off a potent one and captured it in the little box. I quickly ran up to the computer room and said, "Hey, look what just came for you." He shook the box. Of course, it sounded empty. He slowly and carefully opened it, kind of flinching when it opened. Still nothing. Puzzled, he looks in the empty box... and then it hits him. We're talking eye-watering, nose-burning stench!

He got me back by shoving a huge mattress needle in my car seat. I sat on it and came up so fast I banged my head on the roof.

There's more. Much, much more.

 

[MuddyWaterMan]

I always wanted to put Icy-Hot in the captains Preperation -H.

 

[Big country]

When I was 18 or so I was getting started in the welding industry. I applied for a job working in the FAB-SHOP for an iron hanging company. I was asked if I was scared of heights I said no. I lied thinking maybe it was just to see if I'd be willing to to the field every no and then. I was right I was on a job site the next day and every day after that. I will never forget that lesson. Anyway that was from the boss to me here is one from me to the new after I Was considered a "connector" instead of a "turd green new guy". I worked with a guy named Bear, He told me to get the green horn to go get the "beam stretcher" cause the beam was to short. We'd bet the new guy that he couldn't bend more than 20 welding rods against the back of his neck. Well when you a are an iron worker you tuck a t-shirt in and wear a long sleeve over for spark deterrent. and the flux off the rods will turn to an abrasive powder and go down your shirt.
Working in an 18 wheeler shop was the best. We would go behind you with a bead sealer "air cheetah" and scare the crap out of you spray brake fluid under the bathroom door and leave the broom leaning against the door and so many other things.

 

[Acesn8's]

I used to smear black shoe polish on the listening part of the phone (only works with black phones tho) .
I would lift the toilet seat and put stretch wrap over the bowl you couldn't see it.
One time I went up to use the bathroom (double stall) and a buddy was sittin on the john next to me with a cup of coffee on the floor, as I stood there doing my bizness I turned and pissed in his coffee without missing a beat he promptly poured it on my shoe we were both laughin it up I walked out and came right back in with a fire extinguisher stuck it under the stall and emptied it . We spent most of the night cleaning up the mess.

 

[Big country]

That reminds me. There was a classic that we would do when I was water proofing (I got the job latter in life because I wasn't scared of heights after the beam hanging bit was over) we had this Mobadass glue and we'd glue a quarter on to the ground in the main hallway. The city hall we built probably still has quarters glued to it to this day. When I was building rock saws we had a boss that would always park his truck in the back where we weren't allowed to park, He would not move it. So one day one of the parts makers gets done loading the sheets of steal onto his machine and takes one of the forks of and pulls up next to the bosses truck. He then ran inside screaming "&*%& I hit your truck I hit your truck" when they are running out side I could hear him telling him all about the damage. It looked real until you got 10' away from it. The boss never parked back there again.

 

[cowboy45]

I was outside sales and always went in early. We had 4 inside sales people that would come in about 8 am. I pressed all the phone ear pieces on an inked stamp pad and then sat back and watched. ROTFLMAO, They all looked at each other and are going "Whats on your ear"? I was laughing so hard I couldnt get out of the chair and damn near got my but kicked. I was able to escape and bought breakfast in the next day.For months I had to look over my shoulder when I was there, walk around my truck before I left and really watch out. I got home one day after visiting customers in Tomball,Conroe,etc, a lot of montgomery county. My wife pulled in right behind me and says "would you like to explain this". I walk around the back of the truck and there is a rainbow sticker stuck to the bumper and written in the dust on the tailgate, " I am hot" and my cell number.

 

[DoubleActionCHL]

I hate to admit this: I had this guy working for me who was a HUGE homophobe. Combine that with the fact that he drove a powder pink Chevy Monza (remember those?). One day I found a spray can of fake snow, so being the politically incorrect sh%t starter I was, painted the word "FAG" on the rear window of his car.

This guy and a pretty boy body builder at the same company had a rivalry going on, so he blamed the pretty boy for the prank. I heard screaming in the hallway and there was Bill (owner of the pink Monza) huffing down the hall with murder in his eyes. He was going to KILL the pretty boy. I had to chase him down and tactfully convince him that he shouldn't kill anybody, that I did it and it was just a joke.

If I wasn't his boss, he probably would have killed me!

This was a LONG time ago.

 

[Big country]

When I was in high school we would rip off the BIG zip ties from the construction class and a few guys were working as electricians over the summer so we bought most of them. But we would go out into the parking lot at the school and put them around peoples drive shaft. Then we would sit back and watch the show. We got the Ag teacher (also the welding teacher) the wood shop teacher and the electric shop teacher one day as a last hurrah. That was funny, all the way till we got caught by the school resource officer (Leander PD) Who was giggling while telling us that it was wrong. I have never cleaned a shop so good before or ever again in my life.

 

[Wolfwood]

i used to be the HR guy for a sales company.
well one april fool's, well it was the day after, becasue i didn't want to be to obvious, i hid ALL of our office records. old contracts payroll stuff everything with a dolalr sign on it basically.
took it home and put it in my closet while the CEO and everyone esle was out int he field doing the sales thing.
i called the boss out int he field to let him know i finished re-organizing the office.
now i know this next part is highly illegal buuuut also highly hilarious.

i got one of my buddies to call intot the office the next day, and pretend to be an IRS guy, informing us of a suprise inspection. he and i pulled it off perfectly. it was awesome. so anyway Rich (ceo) comes out of the office pale faced and white knuckled. i immediatly say "what happened to you chief? you feeling alright?" i asked while grabbing hima glass of water. he asks "where are our records? our reports? our contracts? im going ot need them today...." i say they are in the bottom of the closet in your office...

i made sure that closet was completely empty.
he went back into his office, and i hear HOLY %##$#^$ $&!# !!!!
i let him run around and panic for about half an hour before i couldnt hold in the laughter anymore.

 

[MadMo44Mag]

Oh so many!
When I worked in the machine shop we had bottled sodas.
One of the guys and I had been dueling back and forth for a few days and he was one up on me. He upended two full sodas in my pants pockets. The uniforms we had had real deep pockets and no way to get them out in time. I went through the day with my pants sticky and nasty.
The next morning he had gone a got a diet coke. After he had drank about 1/3 of the soda I poured dirty honing oil in his soda bottle.
Every time he tilted the bottle for a drink the oil went to the bottom.
The last drink was 100% honing oil.
Needless to say he was well lubed after that.

Another was I would go down to the spring shop where they repaired and or made leaf springs for semi truck.
When shaping springs a large 5lbs short handled hammer is used.
I would remove the wedge in the hammer head.
On the second or third swing the head would fly off and scare the hell out of everyone as well as dam near pull the arm out of socket when all the weight left the hammer.

As I said so many!!!!