The insult thread.

[Vaquero]

Ain't got the sense God gave a mule.

 

[Axxe55]

My uncle retired from the Navy after 22 years in service. That man could insult in ways that would make most people embarrassed!

 

[gamboolman]

I just retired after 43 years in the oilfield on 1-Feb-21. I will admit to many "CLR's" - Career Limiting Remarks.... oh well....

When the boss's would say "we" in a meeting to help justify a ignorant issue - I have been known to tell them - You must have a mouse in your pocket because we did not agree to that shiite.

Was you born stupid - or did you go to college to get a Phd in shiite for brains.

Do you know what a Boss is ? Double SOB spelt backwards

That proposal is beyond stupid

Young project managers would present there projects - and if it was bad - I would tell them that "Your baby is ugly"

Your near to being a ROMF - Run Off Mother Fucker. In truth I did not have to fire very many men over the years.....

In planning meetings for badly planned and budgeted/scheduled Projects - I would tel them - if I truly believed it was bad. I would tell them that there project was Bust before we started.... That always was contentious ... ha

At Kick Off Meetings and Tool Box Talks..... Good morning men - you too (insert name of whoever I was teasing that day)

In AFE Planning meetings - after being subjected too listening to and watching nauseating proposals - If it was bad - I would tell them it works perfect on Power Point but it will not work Offshore.... meeting would degenerate from that point.... ha

Again in AFE Planning and Approval meetings - I had a slide and copy of us Project Construction Guys staring at a complicated board showing plans - with a arrow pointing to the right that said "Then a Miracle Occurs" ha..... then the real meeting would start...

I would argue up to being DFO'd - Direct Fucking Ordered - then we would go and execute the project best we could. Only time I would not follow a DFO was if I was dam sure men would get hurt.... then it got ugly.....

Glad to be retired..... miss the men but do not miss the senior management politickers and outright liars

gamboolman....

 

[Patience0830]

I just retired after 43 years in the oilfield on 1-Feb-21. I will admit to many "CLR's" - Career Limiting Remarks.... oh well....

When the boss's would say "we" in a meeting to help justify a ignorant issue - I have been known to tell them - You must have a mouse in your pocket because we did not agree to that shiite.

Was you born stupid - or did you go to college to get a Phd in shiite for brains.

Do you know what a Boss is ? Double SOB spelt backwards

That proposal is beyond stupid

Young project managers would present there projects - and if it was bad - I would tell them that "Your baby is ugly"

Your near to being a ROMF - Run Off Mother Fucker. In truth I did not have to fire very many men over the years.....

In planning meetings for badly planned and budgeted/scheduled Projects - I would tel them - if I truly believed it was bad. I would tell them that there project was Bust before we started.... That always was contentious ... ha

At Kick Off Meetings and Tool Box Talks..... Good morning men - you too (insert name of whoever I was teasing that day)

In AFE Planning meetings - after being subjected too listening to and watching nauseating proposals - If it was bad - I would tell them it works perfect on Power Point but it will not work Offshore.... meeting would degenerate from that point.... ha

Again in AFE Planning and Approval meetings - I had a slide and copy of us Project Construction Guys staring at a complicated board showing plans - with a arrow pointing to the right that said "Then a Miracle Occurs" ha..... then the real meeting would start...

I would argue up to being DFO'd - Direct Fucking Ordered - then we would go and execute the project best we could. Only time I would not follow a DFO was if I was dam sure men would get hurt.... then it got ugly.....

Glad to be retired..... miss the men but do not miss the senior management politickers and outright liars

gamboolman....

Lot's of hard won wisdom in this. Thanks for your service to us all.

 

[Sam7sf]

 

[oohrah]

Nothing beats - "Bless your heart ..."

 

[plinkr]

Nothing beats - "Bless your heart ..."

#3!

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

 

[TXAZ]

Your (singing, dancing, jokes, other "ability") is so good you should be on the stage.................
There's one leaving in 15 minutes.

 

[TXAZ]

My uncle retired from the Navy after 22 years in service. That man could insult in ways that would make most people embarrassed!

While living in the Middle East, we learned some subtle but biting insults that take at least half a brain and a few seconds to understand if you haven't heard them before. And they're usually said with a kind tone and smile:

May God take your soul. (as in die soon)

May you lose your luck. (as in you're shi+ out of luck in a pejorative manner)

His fuse went out (or isn't lit). (he's an idiot)

Your most lovely daughter reminds me of my soft, comfortable shoes (someone is either dying or getting their ass hospitalized with this one if they're smart enough to realize you consider all of their daughters uglier and lower than a shoe).

May the fleas of 1000 camels enjoy your daughter on her wedding night.

This is such a wonderful event (not), you're so talented I'll bet you planned it in 5 minutes! (as in you clearly didn't put much effort into a bust of an event)

 

[DubiousDan]

You eat $hit and beg for more.

 

[Coop45]

You eat $hit and beg for more.
[/QUOTE]
I might be your daddy.

 

[BRD@66]

Your near to being a ROMF - Run Off Mother Fucker. In truth I did not have to fire very many men over the years.....

gamboolman....

Is "run off" still the used phrase for getting fired or is that one from your early days? "Run off" was in the everyday conversation when I was a worm in 1966. (but I didn't get fired!)

 

[Axxe55]

Is "run off" still the used phrase for getting fired or is that one from your early days? "Run off" was in the everyday conversation when I was a worm in 1966. (but I didn't get fired!)

I have heard the same term years ago. Might be an older generation thing meaning getting fired.

 

[Vaquero]

You wouldn't make a pimple on a lineman's ass.

 

[G O B]

I wish I could buy you for what your worth, and sell you for what you THINK you are.

 

[Saltyag2010]

Great thread. Please make more.

can someone find out how to throw a thread away?

 

[DoubleDuty]

You wouldn't make a pimple on a good ______ s ass

 

[mroper]

You have a lot of class too bad all of it is low

 

[G O B]

If yo MOMMA knew what you would grow to be. she would have thrown YOU away and raised the afterbirth!

 

[LaVbRef]

I refuse to engage in a duel of wits with a defenseless person.