Why we miss rodney dangerfield

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Chat' started by ConnRadd, Aug 18, 2009.

  1. ConnRadd

    ConnRadd Active Member

    Oldie but a goodie...

    > My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me
    > to time an egg.
    >
    > It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips,
    > yet she won't drink from my glass!
    >
    > Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy
    > negligee. The only trouble was....she was coming home.
    >
    > A girl phoned me and said, "Come on over. There's nobody home". I
    > went over. Nobody was home!
    >
    > A hooker once told me she had a headache.
    >
    > I went to a massage parlor. It was self service.
    >
    > If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
    >
    > I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are
    > you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate
    > my self now."
    >
    > I knew a girl so ugly, they used her in prisons to cure sex offenders.
    >
    > My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen
    > the roaches hang themselves.
    >
    > I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for
    > mooning.
    >
    > The other day I came home and a guy was jogging, naked. I asked
    > him, "Why?". He said, "Because you came home early."
    >
    > I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the
    > Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.
    >
    > My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex; she called me from
    > Chicago last night.
    >
    > My family was so poor that if I hadn't been born a boy, I wouldn't
    > of had anything to play with.
     


  2. DCortez

    DCortez TGT Addict

    6,612
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    36
    Jan 28, 2009
    Houston, Cy-Fair
    Good stuff
     
  3. texas1willy2

    texas1willy2 Active Member

    690
    0
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    Apr 20, 2009
    woodlands
    I haven't even heard most of those
     
  4. Okierifleman

    Okierifleman Active Member

    832
    0
    36
    Mar 14, 2009
    Houston
    One of the last great non-pc comedians. An era gone forever.
     

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