You might be a ______ if....

[West Texas]

With all of the series crap going on this could be fun...

A couple of rules...for those that follow them...

1) Start your own list of "You might be a ____ if..."

2) You may add to anyones list but not start a new one with the same "You might be" person/place/thing.

3) Name calling is not only allowed but expected

4) If you can't take an f'ing joke, this one might not be for you...

5) Please make these ORIGINAL (skeeter, that means YOU thought of it)

6) Since I started this mess, I get to cut and paste..

Ok, that was pretty pointless, but hey, I tried!

 

[West Texas]

"YOU MIGHT BE A TALIBAN IF..."

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon "unclean."

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.

10. You've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat.

11. Your cousin is president of the United States