Funny Picture - Video Thread III
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Went to work part time in Jr High at a landscape/plant nursery, where the owner had a big, free range, Shepherd that stood belly high to a good sized horse.
Every woman who came in, no matter age, or how clothed, got a hearty snout bump crotch sniff. No exceptions, except for previous victims who were on the lookout.
Reactions were varied, from a red faced "Ohh my!, to a giggle, to a belly laugh, even from previous victims.
Damn
Inspector43
Everything I Own Is Paid For
I guess I don't.
Battlefield nukes were designed for this!
This is one version of it that I was able to find.
A farmer buys a rooster to service his 200 hens. When he gets the rooster into the barnyard, he tells him, "Randy, I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Have fun, but take your time."
The farmer points him toward the henhouse and the rooster takes off like a shot.
WHAM! Randy nails every hen in the henhouse, three or four times. Randy runs out and sees a flock of geese down by the lake. WHAM! He nails all the geese. Randy runs to the pigpen, the cow pasture -- soon, he's been on every animal on the farm.
The farmer is distraught, worried that his expensive rooster won't even last the day.
Sure enough, the farmer wakes up the next morning to find Randy laid out flat in the middle of the yard, buzzards circling overhead.
The sad farmer shakes his head and says, "Oh, Randy, I told you to pace yourself."
Randy opens one eye, winks, and nods towards the sky, "Shhh, they're getting closer"
Another version:
Down in Africa, a big game hunter took his beloved terrier with him on a safari. The man and dog were close, and were never separated. One day, the dog takes off. The hunter begins frantically tracking his dog, fearing what would happen to the terrier in the African wilds. Comes across a hyena, dead and half eaten. Keeps tracking the dog, expecting the worse. To his amazement, he comes across a leopard, dead and half eaten. Keeps tracking the dog. Comes across a lion, dead and half eaten. The hunter simply cannot believe that his terrier has been able to survive these encounters.
Keeps tracking the dog. Finally sees the dog, lying on its back, motionless in the middle of the African veldt. The hunter runs up to his beloved companion, kneels by his side and begins weeping loudly. "My poor dog. Survived fights with a hyena, leopard and lion just to die out here alone."
As he is kneeling there by the dog, the dog opens one eye and says "Shhhh! I'm going for the buzzards."
Down in Africa, a big game hunter took his beloved terrier with him on a safari. The man and dog were close, and were never separated. One day, the dog takes off. The hunter begins frantically tracking his dog, fearing what would happen to the terrier in the African wilds. Comes across a hyena, dead and half eaten. Keeps tracking the dog, expecting the worse. To his amazement, he comes across a leopard, dead and half eaten. Keeps tracking the dog. Comes across a lion, dead and half eaten. The hunter simply cannot believe that his terrier has been able to survive these encounters.
Keeps tracking the dog. Finally sees the dog, lying on its back, motionless in the middle of the African veldt. The hunter runs up to his beloved companion, kneels by his side and begins weeping loudly. "My poor dog. Survived fights with a hyena, leopard and lion just to die out here alone."
As he is kneeling there by the dog, the dog opens one eye and says "Shhhh! I'm going for the buzzards."
My dads favorite...
An old bull and a young bull are standing at the top of a hill looking at a bunch of cows grazing down below. The young bull turns to the old bull and says “Let’s run down the hill and fk one of them cows!”. The old bull replies, “Son, how about we walk down the hill and fk them all”.
An old bull and a young bull are standing at the top of a hill looking at a bunch of cows grazing down below. The young bull turns to the old bull and says “Let’s run down the hill and fk one of them cows!”. The old bull replies, “Son, how about we walk down the hill and fk them all”.
Inspector43
Everything I Own Is Paid For
Great Thanks.
cycleguy2300
TGT Addict
Same root word. Some used to think it was the uterus that made women "crazy" or as they called it hysterical...
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