You'll shoot your eye out!
Some gun mag writer had a column years ago in which he listed ways to get a new gun smuggled past your wife. One of the suggestions was that you buy the ugliest lamp shade you can find and put it on top of the gun. Then walk in the house and say, "Look what I found at a garage sale!" Immediately the wife will say, "Oh, no you don't! Not in my house; Put that ugly thing in your shop!" Then you have to try to look mournful (and not giggle) as you trudge off with your new prize.
Another suggestion was to have a friend drop the gun off at your house and "thank" you for loaning it to him. If the wife asks, you say, "That old thing? You probably don't remember it because George had it for so long. Last time I loan him a rifle!"