The math ruined it for me. She was 19. Damn OCD anyway.My wife and I were married for 50 years. One day, I took a careful look at her and said, “Fifty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black-and-white TV, but I got to sleep with a hot 23-year-old girl every night.
“Now, I have a $500,000 home, a $45,000 car, a nice big bed and a large-screen TV, but I’m sleeping with a 69-year-old woman. It seems to me that you’re not holding up your side of things.”
My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black-and-white TV.
Aren’t older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy’s problems.
The math ruined it for me. She was 19. Damn OCD anyway.
Ha. Okay, that one took me a moment.A friend showed me a photo of his ex-wife. I said, "She's beautiful." He replied, "If you think she's beautiful, you should see my new girlfriend." "Wow! Is she even better?" He said, "No. She's an optometrist!"
Scene 1, A Cold Day in Scotland:
A knock on the croft door.
Mary: Och Jimmy you're freezing, come on in and have a cup of tea.
Jimmy: Thanks Mary I don't mind if I do.
Mary: Would you like some cake or a meringue?
Jimmy: No, you're right Mary I'd love some cake.
Took me a bit, but hilarious!Scene 1, A Cold Day in Scotland:
A knock on the croft door.
Mary: Och Jimmy you're freezing, come on in and have a cup of tea.
Jimmy: Thanks Mary I don't mind if I do.
Mary: Would you like some cake or a meringue?
Jimmy: No, you're right Mary I'd love some cake.
Okay, this one I'm still working on. Right over my head.Scene 1, A Cold Day in Scotland:
A knock on the croft door.
Mary: Och Jimmy you're freezing, come on in and have a cup of tea.
Jimmy: Thanks Mary I don't mind if I do.
Mary: Would you like some cake or a meringue?
Jimmy: No, you're right Mary I'd love some cake.
You'll get there, say it in dialect.
….