What does your car say about you?

[M. Sage]

I've been a mechanic for more than 10 years, and I've noticed some things about people that drive certain cars... I'm just going to throw some random ones out and come back with more. If you have a request, fire away.

Hope you have a good laugh.

Mercedes C Class: "I want people to think I have more money than I actually do." Or, "I can't afford a real Mercedes."

Mercedes SL Class: "My penis is very small and/or doesn't work."

Any Volkswagen convertible, any VW Beetle (not Bug): "I'm a pretty princess with the cutest car ever!" Yes, that applies to the guys, too. I haven't met a guy that drives one that isn't gay...

Mercedes S Class: "I can't literally beat you over the head with all my money, so I'll have to drive this instead."

Ford Mustang (1995 and newer): "I'm an overweight Hispanic woman in her 20s or early 30s." Also, "I drive 40 miles an hour in the fast lane."

Any diesel truck: "There's shit on my boots..."

Audi TT: "I'm very insecure about my sexuality."

Porsche Boxster: Guys - "I have no idea what a sports car is, so I bought this." Gals - "My husband is rich."

Chevrolet Camaro: New Camaro - "Transformers was the best movie EVAR!!!" If it's not the new Camaro - "The 80s are NOT over!!!"

That's all I've got for now. Throw me some suggestions!

Nissan Titan: "Someone else buys my fuel."

Smart: "I loved roller skating as a kid, so I figured I'd drive one as an adult!"

Veyron: "I can literally beat you over the head with my money, unlike that punk in the S Class."

Honda Civic: "You want fries with that?"

Prelude: "My vocabulary consists mainly of 'bro'."

Toyota Camry: "I'm trying to keep my wife happy on a budget. Help."

Buick Park Ave: "I'm turning left... eventually."

A couple more...

Mid-90's Grand Am: "**** it; it was only $800."

Subaru Impreza WRX STi: "I'm a rally fanboy!"

10 year old Jeep TJ?

"I have every season of MacGuyver on DVD."

 

[SgtBrummy]

Good Stuff!!!
Nissan Titan???

 

[Glockster69]

Smart

ok, srsly

Veyron

oh and please, do an edit/add to your op so there all in one place

 

[smtimelevi]

Honda Civic? Prelude? Toyota Camary? Buick Park Ave(this one should be good)

 

[orbitup]

Mini Cooper: I don't need a penis extension.

Honda Accord: I'm a hot chick (or think I am)

Hummer: I do need a penis extension.

 

[picasso]

I drive a 4 door Jeep Wrangler 2.5" lift and big tires. My wife thinks I'm over compensating.

 

[orbitup]

I drive a 4 door Jeep Wrangler 2.5" lift and big tires. My wife thinks I'm over compensating.

She should know.

 

[Younggun]

94 chevy 1500 4x4 all stock and love it.

 

[mikeofcontex]

95 Aerostar... praise the Lord... it keeps running and gets me where i need to go.

 

[shortround]

Toyota Prius:

"As an elite custodian of this Planet's climate, I am doing more for Mother Earth than all the rest of you diesel-breathing, shi$-kicking, red-neck, right-wing Dodge Ram Heavy Duty owners!"

Be well.

 

[Vaquero]

98 F150 : "I'm about broke"

 

[orbitup]

Toyota Prius:

"As an elite custodian of this Planet's climate, I am doing more for Mother Earth than all the rest of you diesel-breathing, shi$-kicking, red-neck, right-wing Dodge Ram Heavy Duty owners!"

Be well.

Like this?

 

[SgtBrummy]

Like this?

She must have sucked in too many of those fumes. Makes me wanna buy a bigger truck.

 

[scap99]

Damn, y'all beat me to the Prius.

Prius = my shit don't stink.
Volt = where's the return desk?

 

[Glockster69]

Buick Park Ave: "I'm turning left... eventually."

No friggin doubt

 

[smtimelevi]

Toyota Prius:

"As an elite custodian of this Planet's climate, I am doing more for Mother Earth than all the rest of you diesel-breathing, shi$-kicking, red-neck, right-wing Dodge Ram Heavy Duty owners!"

Be well.

Except for the part where the thing has 12 batteries filled with "toxic" lead that need replacing every 3 years.

 

[smtimelevi]

Lincoln Town Car: Hey, **** you I'm Italian and live in Jerzey!

 

[tequila45]

Like this?

not to get off topic but it is his right to buy a truck cause he chooses to, like its her right to buy that prius. she also has a choice to move her own car instead of putting the blame on someone else.

 

[M. Sage]

Except for the part where the thing has 12 batteries filled with "toxic" lead that need replacing every 3 years.

They're nickel hydride and they go 10-15 years. It's also one big pack (except the 12 volt battery, which is an absorbed glass mat type) made out of a bunch of cells that look like D batteries. And even put out a volt and a half each, just like a D battery. Except these each have a thermistor (temperature sensor) attached to the side.

Odd fact: They wired the batteries AND thermistors in series, so the car goes by the total resistance of all the sensors together to determine battery temp.

 

[Vaquero]

Except for the part where the thing has 12 batteries filled with "toxic" lead that need replacing every 3 years.

My pistol is filled with toxic lead that needs replacing every 7 shots.