Texas Ranger ' Chuck Norris is Back"

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris died 15 years ago, death just hasn't worked up the nerve to tell him.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris was dropped twice as a baby.


















Once on Hiroshima, and once on Nagasaki.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris was bitten by a rattle snake once.



After 3 days of excruciating pain, the snake finally died.

 

[Younggun]

Texas Ranger ' Chuck Norris is Back"

Chuck Norris has a bear skin rug in front of his fireplace.



The bear isn't dead, it's just scared to move.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris beat the sun in a staring contest.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris once threw the opening pitch in the World Series.



Both teams forfeit.

All 7 games.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris was once dared to roundhouse kick Mt St Helens.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet. He sacred the shit out of it.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris got pulled over for speeding on the interstate.


He let the cop off with a warning and continued his jog.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris doesn't run with the bulls.

The bulls run with Chuck Norris.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris can get checkmate in one move.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris got drunk one night and pissed in a semi trucks fuel tank.

That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

 

[Younggun]

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he kicks ass with his eyes closed.

 

[Countryfried Frank]

Chuck Norris had his own line of toilet paper but it didn't work. It turns out Chuck Norris doesn't take crap from anyone.

 

[Dawico]

 

[kyletxria1911a1]

Just gonna leave this here

 

[seeker_two]

Phase One of the Blue Bell rollout was delivery to Chuck Norris' house. Phase Two didn't start until Chuck was full.

 

[rdb241]

Chuck Norris is Superman's hero.

Like the gun, Chuck Norris is gay! I bet he tucks his pants inside of his boots.

 

[jrbfishn]

But they are BIG boots.......

from an idgit coffeeholic

 

[Vaquero]

Like the gun, Chuck Norris is gay! I bet he tucks his pants inside of his boots.

Boo