My wife hated the Bersa .380 — said the recoil hurt her hands. She thoroughly enjoyed the M&P compact with the small inserts, did well with the full sized XD9, even felt the Glock 21 .45 had less recoil than the .380. Plus, I want my wife carrying a service caliber — her chances of defending herself against an attacker are less than mine. I want her to have as much firepower as possible. Kahr makes some smaller service caliber semi-autos (qualifying with a semiauto qualifies you for both revolver & semi). M&P compact or shield, Glock 26, 27, 30, Springfield XDs (9mm & .45). Go fondle and shoot as much as you can (That's what she said).