Fiancée & firearms

[Wildcat Diva]

On of the guys I hunted in Africa with had a very young hot trophy wife. Her deciding she wanted to hunt ruined it for him. Sometimes it good for that away time.

My husband and I hardly ever shoot together. It can be done separately. I go and shoot on my own maybe 3-4 times a month.

 

[Bithabus]

Am I going to be the only one going to recommend letting a female work with her? Men and women have different strength levels, size of hands, ways of relating, etc.

Sign her up for “A Girl and A Gun League” if there’s a chapter near you. My AGAG leader is also an NRA instructor. She helped me undo all my bad habits I picked up from my husband and I learning to shoot together on our own.

This. Don't teach her on your own or get some Bubba. I know the ego says "I''m the expert she can learn from me" (I've been there) but it won't work for the best. If you want an actual shooting partner get her a professional instructor and stay away.

 

[Maverick44]

My advise is worth what you pay for it, but I'd just grab a couple of guns that you think she'd be able to shoot decently well with (preferably full sized, low recoiling guns), and just start out with the basics of gun safety. After that, give her a little advise and let her go. Don't try to dictate every little thing she does, just let her do her thing and give friendly suggestions (not commands) periodically as she goes. Let her shoot a mag or two, examine her target with her, and offer suggestions if need be. ALWAYS be supportive and encouraging. Focus on what she's doing right and praise her for it. Don't focus solely on what she does wrong. If she does something seriously wrong or potentially dangerous, calmly stop her and explain the issue.

If you chose to be the one to teach her, you are going to be walking a very fine line. Try to stay out of the teacher/student role as much as possible. Diva's suggestion of having another woman teach her is a MUCH better idea than attempting to do so yourself.

 

[Wildcat Diva]

A lot of simple concepts can be explained on youtube:
Sight picture, racking the slide, grip, stance, etc.

I’ve learned things there like how to rack the slide by pushing the firearm forward moreso rather than pulling the slide back.

If the gun you pick doesn’t fit her hands well, she might not have a great experience. She might need to pick something that fits her hands. Don’t try to get her to shoot a teeny gun, though. That won’t be good for a start.

 

[Inspector43]

On of the guys I hunted in Africa with had a very young hot trophy wife. Her deciding she wanted to hunt ruined it for him. Sometimes it good for that away time.

I would say so too. We raised 6 kids and have been together 48 years. We have always let each other have some of that away time. Knowing we need it.

 

[ZX9RCAM]

On of the guys I hunted in Africa with had a very young hot trophy wife. Her deciding she wanted to hunt ruined it for him. Sometimes it good for that away time.

She said she was game, so he shot her...

 

[Wildcat Diva]

Interest in shooting is something that you shouldn’t begrudge someone because it’s “your” thing and you don’t want encroachment.

It’s a self defense skill for goodness sakes.

You can separate time doing that hobby out if needed. Good communication is needed. Hopefully if one needs time to themselves it could be talked about and understood. I don’t see that as an issue. She should be able to understand that.

 

[ZX9RCAM]

"Then there the Aggie that was hunting in the woods. He happened upon this beautiful woman laying naked in the grass. He asked her, "Are you game?" The woman said "yes."

So he shot her."

 

[Mowingmaniac 24/7]

My wife and I teach each other sorts of things.

She has aptitudes in things I don't and vice versa.

The key is to recognize that.

We often compliment each other which I think somehow helps translate later into, yes, I'm willing to learn from you without my ego being threatened.

I've learned all sorts of things from her and she from me.

Teamwork.

 

[benenglish]

Am I going to be the only one going to recommend letting a female work with her?

Nope. That's a good, practical solution to heading off most problems with a new female shooter.

It kinda pains me to say that, though. I've pretty much specialized in teaching women and I think I do a good job of it. That target audience was the whole reason I got my NRA cert. It stings a little to be dismissed merely because I'm male but that has happened to me several times. Then again, after seeing many other instructors who completely turned off their students, especially the women, to shooting, I can understand how some folks reach the conclusion that men should never teach women beginners. I may not like it but I can understand it.

 

[LaVbRef]

Am I going to be the only one going to recommend letting a female work with her? Men and women have different strength levels, size of hands, ways of relating, etc.

Sign her up for “A Girl and A Gun League” if there’s a chapter near you. My AGAG leader is also an NRA instructor. She helped me undo all my bad habits I picked up from my husband and I learning to shoot together on our own.

That's what I did for my wife......and now she bugs me when we haven't gone to the range in the week. Female only class with two female instructors. Bought her a Sig P250 compact 9mm with the 22cal conversion kit. Passed her concealed carry quals the first time she shot both calibers though she had put 1000 rounds through the 22 before she transitioned to the 9mm. Solid pistol that soaks up the recoil though I would like an lesser trigger pull.

 

[m5215]

My wife and I teach each other sorts of things.

She has aptitudes in things I don't and vice versa.

The key is to recognize that.

We often compliment each other which I think somehow helps translate later into, yes, I'm willing to learn from you without my ego being threatened.

I've learned all sorts of things from her and she from me.

Teamwork.

BINGO! That's us!!

 

[m5215]

Am I going to be the only one going to recommend letting a female work with her? Men and women have different strength levels, size of hands, ways of relating, etc.

Sign her up for “A Girl and A Gun League” if there’s a chapter near you. My AGAG leader is also an NRA instructor. She helped me undo all my bad habits I picked up from my husband and I learning to shoot together on our own.

She implicitly wants only me to introduce her to this so she will not accept this option. Keep in mind this will only be the basics. Nothing "tactical" at all.

 

[oldag]

If one is not able to teach gun safety and shooting to their wife without a lot of strife, then the marriage may not last long anyhow.

I second the idea of starting with a .22 (even if you have to borrow one), then step up to .38.

Great idea to explain (via the animations) how a pistol works. Also a little lesson on the function of the primer, power, etc. as well.

After learning the basics, then maybe a class is in order.

 

[Mohawk600]

My fiancée has recently expressed an interest in learning how to shoot a pistol! I briefly mentioned it to her earlier but I did not push the subject beyond that so it is great to hear that she is interested as I wanted her to be proficient in the use of a pistol so she can defend herself if needed. We are first going to be doing some dry fire training/practice as I have one of those laser targeting systems that I can use on any of my pistols at home. She seems to not be intimidated by firearms so I think she will be fine starting with a 9mm pistol so I will likely have her try one of my S&W 5906 pistols first since it has some weight to it to absorb a good amount of recoil. After that I will probably have her try several others such as the CZ-75, Beretta 92FS, and SIG P226. Perhaps even have her try my CZ-83 and Beretta Model 84 in .380 ACP. I don't know yet if she is going to want to get a CWL but if she changes her mind I will work with her to find a good compact pistol for her to carry.

Took my 14 yo daughter shooting for the first time last summer......intended to keep it to .22LR and 9mm.......OMG.....she took to it immediately. In the course of one afternoon.....22 LR was boring.......9mm was mastered in short order. Quickly went to an AR with a brace (hitting flip targets at 50 yds with rapid fire).....then to a PTR 91 and ended up with my friends Glock 10mm.....she couldn't get enough of that 10mm. Never underestimate the capabilities of a girl/woman when it comes to firearms.

 

[Wildcat Diva]

She implicitly wants only me to introduce her to this so she will not accept this option. Keep in mind this will only be the basics. Nothing "tactical" at all.

Ok got it. Youtube can still help you to explain concepts. You can watch together and discuss. She can review the concepts if needed on her own time.

I like Kim.

 

[Wildcat Diva]

Nope. That's a good, practical solution to heading off most problems with a new female shooter.

It kinda pains me to say that, though. I've pretty much specialized in teaching women and I think I do a good job of it. That target audience was the whole reason I got my NRA cert. It stings a little to be dismissed merely because I'm male but that has happened to me several times. Then again, after seeing many other instructors who completely turned off their students, especially the women, to shooting, I can understand how some folks reach the conclusion that men should never teach women beginners. I may not like it but I can understand it.

I think dismissed might be too strong a term, but if you are in the same/similar boat as someone it can make things easier sometimes. It’s worth considering.


For example:
Husband and I both shot the same firearm (taking turns) at a match and I consistently had jams during the match when he didn’t. It was a stressful situation and he just didn’t know what to tell me. Caused contention between us.

That week, couple days later, My lady AGAG leader surmised that it WAS a little bit of grip problem but MOSTLY the problem was not enough gun oil PLUS less upper body strength on my part.

Husband wasn’t having the problems because his increased upper body strength could better manage the recoil so the firearm could still cycle properly (without causing a jam) and I couldn’t, until the thing got oiled a little better.

She understood it, by being in my shoes, when he couldn’t.

 

[benenglish]

I understand where you're coming from and I've acknowledged the practicality of that viewpoint. I can live with it but I don't have to like it.

The qualifications of pistol coaches and where they get their skills is a huge subject and way off-topic for this thread. No one wants to read the giant walls of text I'd be tempted to write on the subject.

So I'll leave it at that.

 

[Wildcat Diva]

Yeah. I get it.

Having some stuff in common (between coach and student) can be an advantage and help you have understanding and empathy, but it’s not the be all end all. I was just bringing up that point because no one else was saying it yet. And men are always complaining about trouble relating to women, and you’ll hear women complain about their interactions with men (even caring, positive men who try). So that’s a thing. Mars and Venus and all that.

 

[Mowingmaniac 24/7]

My .02 cents.

Some men, me for instance, 'like' women. I like everything about them......

Sounds simplistic and it is, but it's true.

Some men, discreetly or not so discreetly hold women in contempt, though they like having sex with them, reproducing, accepting and taking their love for granted. Plus, all the myriad things women do for them is also taken for granted.

These guys don't appreciate what they have......