Subject: The Rabbi is leaving
**********
At the regular Saturday morning service, the rabbi announced that, because of his growing family, he was planning to leave for a larger congregation that would pay him more.
There was a hush within the congregation.
He was so popular, no one wanted him to leave.
Fred Shapiro, who owned several car dealerships in Venice and Sarasota, stood up and proclaimed,
"If the rabbi stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!"
The congregation sighed in appreciation and applauded.
Saul Cohen, a successful businessman and lawyer, stood and said,
"If the rabbi will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary and establish a foundation to guarantee a free college education for his children!"
More sighs and loud applause.
Estelle Rubin, age 88, stood up, smiled and announced, "If the rabbi stays, I will give him sex!"
There was total silence.
The rabbi, blushing, stood up & asked her: "Mrs. Rubin, you're a wonderful and holy lady. Whatever possessed you to say that?"
Estelle's 90-year old husband, Abe, was trying to hide, holding his forehead with the
palm of his hand and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replied:
"Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, 'F$@k him!
**********
At the regular Saturday morning service, the rabbi announced that, because of his growing family, he was planning to leave for a larger congregation that would pay him more.
There was a hush within the congregation.
He was so popular, no one wanted him to leave.
Fred Shapiro, who owned several car dealerships in Venice and Sarasota, stood up and proclaimed,
"If the rabbi stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!"
The congregation sighed in appreciation and applauded.
Saul Cohen, a successful businessman and lawyer, stood and said,
"If the rabbi will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary and establish a foundation to guarantee a free college education for his children!"
More sighs and loud applause.
Estelle Rubin, age 88, stood up, smiled and announced, "If the rabbi stays, I will give him sex!"
There was total silence.
The rabbi, blushing, stood up & asked her: "Mrs. Rubin, you're a wonderful and holy lady. Whatever possessed you to say that?"
Estelle's 90-year old husband, Abe, was trying to hide, holding his forehead with the
palm of his hand and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replied:
"Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, 'F$@k him!